Random Thoughts

As those of you that probably haven't seen my blog for a while, I changed it! I like it a lot, except for the fact that the pictures of the equinox does not stretch all the way across the brown area at the top. Oh well. Not important. I'm trying to not be so perfectionist, so this is more practice! =)

But anyway, life is flying by. I can't believe I only have two weeks until mom, dad, and Neal come down here. We have been talking about that day before I even left for Mexico so it is weird that it is already here! I'm trying not to mourn the time passing but I am. I know I keep talking about how I am going to miss the people, the language, the culture, and the differences but I think about that everyday. I miss my family, my pets, my friends, and Neal but living outside of reality has been kind of nice. However, I'm afraid of having culture shock when I return home just from adapting myself to a completely different place, culture, and language. I have learned a lot about myself while on this journey and I hope that doesn't end when I return home. I have gained a new appreciation for my family who is waiting patiently for us to reunite again and my friends that are doing so well in school but are also a void in my life right now. We all miss each other but it has become something accepted in my life since I have been without everyone for 3 months. I thought these days would never come, but they have, and of course, now its going to be bittersweet. I feel that God is teaching me not to be anxious about anything or think at all about the following day because he can always surprise me and he has surprised me.

Something can happen that changes our lives forever. This experience in Mexico will never be forgotten. It will not be a lost memory in the back of my mind or little souvenoirs (sp) sitting on a bookshelf or table. Everything has meaning and a purpose. Now I'm just trying to figure out what my purpose in life is which I can tell will be a lifelong journey. My alone times with God every morning have been refreshing. I have no reason for not doing it in the past but for me He has to bring me to a point where I can't do anything but rely on Him to actually listen to his soft voice, to be able to see his creations and glory all around, and to feel His tender hugs comforting me in times where I can't find comfort anywhere else. I'm so glad for those times and I pray that I would continually to seek comfort and peace in Him alone and not to take control of it all.

God has little by little been opening my eyes to His presence and His work in so many peoples' lives and how he intervenes. Little things like the rain stopping right before I leave for my internship, keeping me safe on bus rides that I don't feel safe after bus drivers checking me out while they are driving, not getting in any accidents on the buses, and allowing my uncle to be awake and not driving when he had his stroke. God is gracious and merciful. I am constantly learning what it means to bask in His glory and I pray that wouldn't stop when I return to my comforts at home. I also hope that He would put me out of my comfort zone when I'm at home. I'm getting excited to see what is coming my way. I don't know if I am out of a storm, in a storm, or going into a storm but I have a feeling that will be evident soon. But thanks to Liz, lately I have had her phrase of "Love the person, Hate the sin" stuck in my head because it has been something I have had to deal with this whole semester. This week has been going by slowly but this weekend was great. I had time to myself while all the girls went to a movie and shopping. I ate pizza to myself and just meditated on what God's desires are for my future. We will have to see what the rest of this week brings!

Only 4 weeks left here. This is the phrase that has been playing over and over in my mind this week. This weekend will not be one full of travel because we are wanting to go to a soccer game Saturday night and we were supposed to have a field trip for my Art and Architecture class to see some more ruins but we are getting the effects of Hurricane Ida that is on the east coast of Nicaragua. It is predicted to hit the state of Quitana Roo which is where Cozumel, Cancun, and Tulum are on Sunday. So right now we are having tons of rain which is very unusual and high winds. Since Merida does not have a system of drainage due to the kind of land we have, going downtown right now could be risky. They seriously don't have deep drains in the streets so the streets downtown end up flooding until the sun comes out and evaporates all of it. The rain here also makes the roads slick and scary to drive on. So we don't have our field trip because Val is considering it a Yucatacan style of a snow storm! Yay! So who knows if we will end up going to the soccer game Saturday night or not. However, I am able to catch up on some sleep, talk to family, and enjoy some alone time. =) I have worked ahead in classes so that I hardly have homework anymore unless it is my literature class which we don't have a syllabus for so there is no way to work ahead. But, I only have 4 weeks left here. Every other weekend is jam-packed with traveling and spending time with mom, dad, and Neal so I am trying to take advantage of this calm weekend here in Merida.

And just to calm everyone's fears, we are 4 hours away from the coast of Quitana Roo so we will only have lots of rain and high winds. Everyone here is keeping a close eye on the storm and the worst thing that would happen would be that we lock ourselves in this mansion and hang out! There is nothing to be scared of and personally, I am welcoming the hurricane-like conditions. Val, as you read this you will probably not like this, but this will probably be my only time to live through hurricane-like conditions in my lifetime so why not want to experience something I will never get to experience again!?!? We will have to see what this weekend brings! It is actually chilly here to all of us. I know you are all going to hate this, but it is 73 right now and I have a long-sleeve t-shirt and running pants on as I write this. It is quite chilly with all the rain and wind coming through the windows. But oh how the air smells fresher! Thank you rain!

I have also been in prayer for the past 2 days because I found out yesterday morning that my uncle, one of my dad's brothers had a mini stroke Wednesday late at night. He is only 3 years older than my dad so it makes me scared that something like that could happen to my dad since strokes are very common on his side of the family. But thank goodness, he has been taking a baby aspirin everyday since his mom, my grandma, died of an annurism. And, my dad's dad, my grandpa Torgeson, has had a stroke that has affected his left side as well, so fighting the worry of my future has seriously become a battle in the past 2 days.

But, for me, this situation doesn't calm my fears about having a blood clot someday--it makes it worse. After having the scare earlier this semester, and knowing that a stroke is caused by a blood clot in the brain and that my mom has already had a blood clot in her leg does not look optimistic for me! I keep reminding myself that I am not in control so the only thing I can do is take a baby aspirin and pray. If anyone feels lead, and is prompted by the Holy Spirit, simple prayers for strength and a calm heart for me would be greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a wonderful, relaxing weekend as winter is fast approaching.

A Godcidence

Last night after returning from our field trip downtown, a woman that works in the Central College Abroad office arrived here with her sister to spend a couple days sitting in on classes, going to internships, and spending time with us one-on-one to see how things are going. She and her sister as well as Val and the visiting professor came and visited me at the Patronato when I was there today. They gave me a ride home so I didn't have to spend an hour making the trek back to the house which I was very appreciative of. As we were sitting in the car discussing why I was working with the kids and how it doesn't fit with my major but that I am trying to get as much experience as possible working with children with disabilites, we got to talking about how she started working at Central. I knew her name was Jen Larson and her sister's name is Megan Stewart (spelling) but I had never seen Jen on campus. Come to find out, she worked at Cornell right after graduating from Central. So my first response/question was, do you know Nancy Reasland (Neal's mom that is a nurse at Cornell) and she said, ya! of course! Jen then told me that her mom works in the alumni office so she and her mom both know Nancy. At that point, Jen says, of course I know the Reasland's. I am from Lisbon. I then started laughing so hard. Come to find out, Jen's sister Megan who was with in the car graduated with Liz, Neal's sister-in-law and Megan's boyfriend graduated a year ahead of Aaron, Neal's brother and is now an assistant football coach at Cornell so I'm sure Ray knows him. I first told them that I am very good friends with Aaron and Liz and they were saying, "Oh we love them! They are so fun to be around!" And I of course had to ask if they knew Neal. They both said yes and Megan turns to me and says, "Neal is such a sweetheart" and I said, "I completely agree" and she responds, "You do? Why is that?" and I say, "Well I'm dating him...". Their responses were priceless. It became very obvious that this world is very small!!! Come to find out, Neal knows Megan pretty well since she transferred to Cornell from Central when Neal was there and they were only two years apart in school. So basically we all had to come to Merida to find out we both knew the same family! How crazy. We then started talking about FCA and just their faith so it was awesome to learn more about them and to think that they know the Reasland's! Sorry, but as you can probably tell, I am still in shock that it is such a small world! Jen already invited me to her and her husband's house for supper some night in Pella. She and Megan are so sweet. It was definitely a Godcidence today! =)

Colonial Architecture

Sorry this is blurry...but off to the left is a church that used to be a fortress because when the Spaniards came to conquer Mexico, they brought friars or monks with to bring catholicism here and the Mexicans were the ones who had to build the churches so they became to look more like fortresses than churches because in Yucatan, the mayans were constantly fighting the monks so the church and other buildings around it became a place for the monks to live, a place of worship, and place of defense. The churches served three purposes at that point.

The patio in the middle of the school of architecture. Our professor took us there because that is where she studied to get her Bachelor's and Master's of architecture. I really wish I could go to a school that looks old but now functions as if it was new! I just love the look of it being old...

One staircase that took my breath away--stone steps with rounded doorways and ceilings.

This is inside the oldest building in Merida. It is now a art and music school for children but this is where the monks would have lived. The classrooms used to be the monks' rooms. I love the tile, columns, rounded doorways, and rounded ceilings!

On Tuesday after returning from Chiapas we had regular classes which went really well and fast. I got a lot done yesterday and even got in a nap which I was happy about! Then at night I always have Art and Architecture and last night we went to downtown Merida to look at colonial architecture. I have decided that I love colonial architecture because it looks old and has so much character. I love it when buildings and homes look old but yet have been refurbished to live in or conduct business in. I just love the character that older homes give! I thought I would share some pictures that I took last night so that way you could also see what a lot of downtown Merida looks like.

Trip to Chiapas: Monday

On Monday we made our way back to Merida and made good time. The van was of course becoming very uncomfortable really quickly but we did it. We made it back in about 7 hours when it usually takes 8-9 hours. We only stopped twice so that helped! There were also not as many curves like there are in the mountains so we didn't have to slow down all the time. I think I forgot to mention on Sunday and well Friday too that I officially am against topes (toe-pays). Topes are speed bumps and they are all over the place on the way up and down the mountain because there are so many small villages that we pass through. When I was co-pilot for Raul, the driver of the van, I joked with him and told him in Spanish that I just love topes. He looked at me and smiled and knew I didn't mean it. Haha...He picked up on my sarcasm!! And he replied, in Spanish, I think that every family has a tope. I got a kick out of it! He was hilarious and a great driver that put up with all of us. Koodos to him for putting up with a bunch of American college students! Once we got back to Merida, I unpacked all my gifts out of bags and packed them into Neal's suitcase that I brought down here because I really don't have room for them. Its not quite full yet, but I know it will be. I'm afraid mom, dad, and Neal are going to have to bring down a small empty suitcase with them! It is only 19 days until they get down here!! At least we are under 3 weeks now! But, it means that my time here is coming to an end very quickly. I just have 4 weeks and 2 days left here and I feel like its not enough. Don't get me wrong, I want to come home, but this semester has come and gone. I feel like its all been a dream and has passed overnight. Luckily, I have this blog to go back and read what I went through over the past 2 1/2 months I have been here. I can't believe on Sunday it will be 11 weeks since I have been here. I just can't believe it. Before I know it, I will be back and be able to spend time with and see you all!! I am rather excited for that.

Thanks for taking the time to read all my posts about Chiapas! I hope you all understand what I mean since I couldn't take pictures. The week is almost over!

Trip to Chiapas: Sunday

On Sunday morning after having breakfast at the hotel we all hit the road and went to two indigenous villages up in the mountains outside of San Cristobal. The first village is called San Juan Chamula and it has been selected as a World Heritage Town. We were not able to take pictures of anything in the town--buildings, people, etc. because they don't want it to become a huge tourist spot. Bare with me as I try "to use my words" to explain everything I saw...as Josh Groban is playing in my headphones. =)

Chamula is about 20 minutes by car from San Cristobal. As we were driving there, people were walking down from their houses outside of Chamula to go to the cemetery. They all had pine needles and marigolds in their hands. The pine needles are used to clean off the graves and then they put marigolds all over the graves. This cemetery was very different from the cemetery in San Cristobal because this town has kept its heritage since the Pre-Hispanic area so (1200-1500AD) so the graves are very simple and are covered with dirt and not buried very deep. They also did not have any tombs like my pictures showed from the cemetery in San Cristobal. We then walked down into the town and I was in love with the difference in culture and the fact that this village has kept its heritage. The men were wearing sheep skins as almost a shawl (space cut to go around their neck, and then their arms were free--There were not sleeves). They wore a long sleeve shirt like a button down flannel shirt underneath and had a belt around the sheep skin probably about the height of the belly button because then they just wore jeans, boots, and a cowboy hat to finish it off. The women wore black sheep skin skirts and very decorative blouses. It was also that undergarments were not that important to them because there were women just openly breast feeding while we were there. I have no problem with that but it is completely different than if we were in the US.

As we walked to the market which was in the town square we got a little glimpse of their culture. It would have been a perfect postcard to take a picture of men sitting around or standing and talking amongst themselves outside the municipal building, but of course we didn't even take our cameras with us to respect their desires. Then the church courtyard and church were about a football field length away from the municipal building. Since we didn't have Luis who knows everything about anywhere we go, we didn't really know if we would be allowed into the church. Since Day of the Dead was Monday and we were there on Sunday, they were starting a whole ceremony that Val had never seen before because she had only been there on a regular Sunday which is a completely different experience. As we walked to the church, the autoridades or authorities were kind of outside their church courtyard when normally they are on one of the sides of the market taking care of business. Val told us that usually people come and tell them about what has happened like someone stole some sheep or something and they will make justice happen. It is just like it was in the Pre-Hispanic era.

So as we were walking into the church courtyard, we just kind of kept our distance and walked slowly because we didn't even know if we were allowed in. Right away Val noticed that the church doors were completely open which is never the case. When we walked in the doors my jaw dropped probably to the floor. The actual sanctuary was huge! There were banners hung from the walls across the width of the walls that were very elaborate. The length of the church was probably about 50 yards. So as we walk in, there are only men filling up the church except for about 30ft. from the church doors. There were about 15 flags that different men were holding that had different depictions of Jesus. There was then incense filling the church from closer to the altar. Then as I look to the direction of the altar, I see 3 different, decorated crosses on poles being carried closer to the church doors where we were standing off to the side at. As they start making their way to the men with the flags, the band really starts playing. There were a couple brass instruments and a trumpet and quite a few drums. So by this time, the sounds, smells, and what we were seeing was becoming overwhelming but an amazing overwhelming feeling. There was no culture shock for me because I was just trying to experience everything and not think about anything else.

So once the crosses got to the men with the flags, I saw 5 saints neatly decorated with silk and cloth and mirrors around their necks that the people believe reflects the bad spirits out. All of a sudden, they make a line and face the church doors and church courtyard. They start marching out and I was in awe. These people were so into their ceremony that they didn't realize we were there. Once they all paraded out, we walked up front and saw saints in glass boxes on both sides of us. I was kind of feeling awkward and really felt that there was a presence of a demonic spirit. So I walked down the middle and looked at the saints which freaked me out and then looked at the altar which was very decorated and decided to walk out. Once we got back into the church courtyard, we saw that the whole parade was making a pass around the entire fenced-in courtyard. So we decided to stand in the middle of the courtyard to be out of the way but the bells outside of the church were ringing at this point and the authorities were lighting fireworks that were on poles that they were holding up in the air. Then they put a bunch of small fireworks on terraces and they all went off at once. There were three terraces that made sort of a triangle figure and when they went off we wished someone would have taken video of us because we all jumped, screamed, huddled in together and felt awkward because all these fireworks were going off around us. Normally in the US we have to be about a football field distance away from the fireworks going off, but no, not here! They weren't like normal fireworks with colors but they were VERY loud! So at this point, we decided to walk out of the church courtyard and walk around the market. Once the parade of flags, crosses, saints, and the band made one pass around the courtyard, the saints were carried back into the church but the rest of the parade made 4 or 5 more passes by the time we left.

Chamula was an experience I will never forget. I just hope you understand what I mean as I am trying to explain in detail what my perceptions and experiences were. Once we left Chamula, we headed for Zinacantan which was about 10min. away and the town was completely dead. We didn't even know where the cemetery was. This town is known for their flower fields which produces flowers that are then shipped around the world. We couldn't take pictures of the people or the church at this town either but I did get a couple pictures of the town. However, they didn't turn out very well at all so I'm not going to put them on here. This church was not as elaborate but it was nicely decorated. There were about 5 glass caskets with a figure of Jesus laying in them and I asked why that was and I found out that for the Mayans they believe they need to see Jesus in the tomb. I don't know if its to symbolize that He actually came here or to see Him dead. I have no clue. I just know I do not believe that He is still dead, because I know for a fact that He is ALIVE. I also found out that if you go outside the church into a separate building that is like a chapel, there are authority figures that hand out liquor that is supposedly their form of communion? I feel that I am missing a lot of information because Luis wasn't with us. But, when he goes with us to Chichen Itza, I will ask him these things and get it all cleared up! =)

But while standing around outside the church in Zinacantan I found out that if we would have gone to the church in Chamula on a typical Sunday we would have seen families performing their own ceremonies on the floor of the church. They probably would have been sacrificing a chicken or small animal and then had the liquor in front of them with the candles as well as a 2L bottle of Coke or Pepsi. They have the pop because they believe that evil spirits are released when they burp. There is definitely a combination of Peganism and Catholicism. However, it is hard to explain their beliefs because they pray to saints and have crosses but yet they still make animal sacrifices, have to burp to let evil spirits, and have to see Jesus laying in a tomb. So I was trying to find a balance between their religion and traditions and my beliefs and The Truth. However, I was just observing so I was just trying to experience everything possible.

After leaving Zinacantan, we made our way back down the mountains to Palenque where we spent Sunday night in the same hotel we spent in Thursday night. I can't tell you how much I will not take TV and air conditioning for granted! I have only had either when we have been in a hotel. But then again, its been great not having to have a TV especially since I hardly watch it anyway except to pop in a movie or to watch TLC. =)

Trip to Chiapas: Saturday

On Saturday morning I got up for breakfast and went to one of the markets that has fixed prices before going to the cemetery at noon. The following are pictures I took at the cemetery in San Cristobal when no one was in the area. There are tombs that are very elaborate and some that are very simple. Some are very old and some look very modern. I tried to pick the pictures so you could in a sense get an idea of the differences in tombs and how close they are packed together. Walking through the cemetery was uplifting for me since I am not scared to die. I am also not afraid of people when they have passed away. I think the most comforting but hardest thing I have ever done was kissing my grandpa's forehead before his funeral. There was no need to be scared since I knew where he was at and I knew he was better off but Saturday was not an easy day because walking through cemeteries makes me really think of him and what he meant to me, what I miss, etc. I really do miss him so see these tombs or graves was hard knowing that he is not here anymore. There have been days where I look at my American phone or my bulletin board here because they both have pictures of the two of us together and its almost as if he has never left. I do feel him around me quite often and there have been times where I have cried about something and all of a sudden he is here and has his arms wrapped around me and I become calm all of a sudden. Its hard to explain but his spirit comes back very often and I think that is one of the reasons I am so comfortable being around people that have died. I also have the hope of eternity with my Creator but knowing that my grandpa who I was very close to, is much better off and not having to deal with pain, stares or difficulties gives me all the peace in the world.

This area of the cemetery basically only had graves with crosses and grass around the graves. I don't think any family members had been there yet. This area also shows the difference in social class and income compared to the other pictures below.

There were many colorful tombs but others that were very simple. The architecture of the tombs and the colors, etc. are decided by the family because here in Mexico the family is in charge of the grave or tomb and they do not pay someone to take care of the plot of land like we do in the US.

This one was my favorite. It has so much character. There was not a grave in it. Some tombs are built over a grave and others have bone boxes in them. After a family member has died and there isn't more space to put someone else, they dig up the body and put the bones in a box and then place those boxes in the tombs. Otherwise like the picture above this picture has a tomb that is orange with black metal over the windows and it is built so that the caskets could be placed in one of the sides of the tomb. If you can see it, the caskets would go on the left side of the tomb where there are no windows.

The cemetery was sooo beautiful!

This was the entrance to the cemetery. The castle looking building to the right is an actual tomb.

After being at the cemetery, us girls got some lunch and then got all of our shopping done at a market downtown that we could bargain at. I got all my Christmas gifts already bought for!!